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Wednesday, December 06, 2006

I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY


Why? Why? Why?

Just now my daughter called me and cried over the telephone , she said she could't study due to laziness and the exam just round the corner.It's not the first time she behaves like that....as far as i could remember , i too hated exams very much but i forced myself to read even i was last-minute kind of person. I didn't cry if i couldn't finish revising.That was why my result never the best or at least better.It always cukup2 makan.

I wonder why my children do not follow their father's character...why must they follow me...shy,lack of confident,last- minute kind of person , lack of leadership qualities and lazy to struggle ..i wish i can turn them the other way raound.

Until now i notice i still shy away with my husband men friends.When talking, i can't look into their eyes for more than 5 seconds...i have to force my eyes looking straight into their eyes by just staring and smiling but my brain said i look dumb.With them i always feel that i will be judged, the way i look,the way i talk ,the way i dress and i hate that....in my little mind i always think men in that way.

Back to my daughter, there are many similarities between us.She is shy the way i am.We can only be comfortable in ones company when we really know each other very well and chemistry do play its partl.when we fall in love there will be no flirting eventhough men come and go in our lives we will stick to one.This is because we can make friends easily but hard to fall in love.Just one slightest mistake the chemistry wont work out.We are sensitive creatures...always carefull not to hurt other people feelings cos we also dont like people to hurt our feelings. In this case understanding is needed in our relationships.We like simplicity, not looking for material but more toward kindness that is why our friends is from all types as long we can feel their kindess.

We cant adapt with high standards of people especially if they look down upon us.We wont feel comfortable.We always admire people with high qualities such as intelligent ,leadership and creativity.We always love to be with them eventhough sometimes we feel inadequate to be in the group.We sometimes like to be alone in a place we love to be with our own sweet times to spend so that we can think clearer not with the influence of anybody.....Actually there are so much more to write but i think its enough for the day....

Lastly i just pray that my daughter will put a little more effort to study smartly eventhough
she is still a kind of last-minute and a lazy bum.U can cry baby but still u cannot escape the test...so whether u are lazy or what u will have to study in order to answer your test. Cmon baby ,mama says grow UPPPPPP.

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